
Entered, according to Act of Conf?resfl, in the year 1873 by George M. Baker, in the Office of the 
Librariaa of Congress, at Wasluncton. 



za:Ja<:hGQ<J0J(K}JO<^OQ^OQ^OQ^OQ^(y^oaoa(Ja:JQa':loa^^ 



SPEHCER'S univehsal stage. 

( ) A Collection of COMEDIES, BRAMAS, and FAUCES, adapted to either Public 
'*' or Private Performance. Containinr/ a full description of all 

the necessary Stage Business. 



Pit ICE, 15 CENTS EACH. ^^^ No Flays exchanged. 



1. liost iu I^ondoii. A Drama in 

Tlirc'o Acts. Mule, 4 Female char- 
acters. 

2. Kicliolas Flam. A Comedy in Two 

Acts. By .J. li. Buckstone. 5 Male, 
3 Female characters. 

3. The ^Velsh Oirl. A Comedy in 

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2 Female characters. 

4. Joliii Wopps. A Farce in One Act. 

By \y. E. Suter. 4 Male, 2 F.-male 
characters. 

5. Tlie Tuikisli Batli. A Farce in 

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6. Tlie Two Pudtlifoots. A Farce 

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Male, 3 Female characters. 

7. Old Honesty. A Comic Drama in 

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8. T^vo Gentlemen in a Fix. A 

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2 Male characters. 

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4 M;ile, 1 Female character. 

11. Jolin I>obbs. A Farce in One Act. 

JJ. J. M. j"\lorton. 5 Male, 2 P>male 
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12. The l>aMgliter of tlie Regi- 
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10. 



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(5 Male, 2 Female 



13. 



C) 



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Annt Charlotte's Maid. A Farce 
in One Act. By J. 31. 3Iorton. 
3Iale, 3 Female characters. 

14. Brother Bill and Me. A Farce in 

One Act. By W. E. Suter. 4 3Iale, 
3 Female characters. 

15. Done on Both Sides. A Farce in 

One Act. By .1. 31. 3Iorton. 
3Iale, 2 Female characters. 

je. "Onndncketty's Picnic. A Farce 
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3Iale, 3 Female characiers. 

17. I've written to Browne. A Farce 
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2 bemale characters. 

19. My Precious Betsy. A Farce in 

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4 Female characters. 

20. MyTnrnlVext. A Farce in One Act. 

By T. J. Williams. 4 31ale, 3 Fe 
male characters. 

21. IVine Points of the Law. A Com- 

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4 3Iale, 3 Female diaracters. 

22. The Phantom Breakfast. A 

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3Iale, 2 Female characters. 

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26. A Biill in a China Shop. A Com- 

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thews. 6 Male, 4 Female characters. 

27. Another Glass. A Drama in One 

Act. By Thomas 3Iorton. 6 Male, 

3 Female characters. 

28. Bowled Out, A Farce in One Act. 

By H. T. Craven. 4 Male, 3 Female 
characters. 

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.30. Sarali's Young Man. A Farce in 
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3 Female characters. 

31. Hit Him, He has IVo Friends. 

A Farce in One Act. By E. Yates 
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in One Act. By J.M. 3Iorton. 3 
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.C)nr/OvQCOCOOkQCOOOt)OOOaOOOOQ'DOO^OOLXOQQOOOO ' 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 



/ 



Ji Farc^, 



BY THE AUTHOB OF 

"Sj'lvla's Soldier," 
•' Once on a Time," " Down by the Sea," " The Last Loaf," 
" Bread on the Waters," " Stand by the Flag," " The Tempter," " A Drop top 
Much," " We're all Teetotalers," "A Little more Cider," " Thirty Minutes 
for Refreshments," " Wanted, a Male Cook," "A Sea of Troubles," 
" Freedom of the Press," " A Close Shave," " The Great 
Elixir," " The Man with the Demijohn,"'" Humors of 
the Strike," " New Brooms sweep Clean," " My 
Uncle the Captain," " The Greatest Plague 
in Life," " No Cure, no Pay," " The 
Grecian Bend," " War of the 
>^ . ,- Hoses," " Lightheart's 

•A - Pilgrimage," 

" The 
Sculptor's 
Triumph," "Too 
Late for the Train," 
" Snow-Bound," " The Ped- 
dler of Very Nice,''' " Bonbons," 
" Capuletta," " An Original Idea," " My 
Brother's Keeper," " Among the Breakers," 
"The Boston Dip," " The ])uchess of Dublin," "A 
Tender Attachment," " Gentlemen of the Jury," " A Public 
Benefactor," "The Thief of Time,' "The Hypochondriac," "The 
Runaways," "Coals of Fire," "The Rod Chignon," " Using the Weed," 
" A Love of a Bonnet," " A Precious Pickle," " The Revolt 
of the Bees," "The Seven Ages," 
&c.,&c.,&c. 






BO STON: 

GEORGE M. BAKER & CO., 

149 Washington Street. 






Entered. "according to Act of Congress, In the year 1873 by 

GEORGE M. BAKER, 

In the Office of the Librarian of Congress at Washington, 



Hand, A very, &* Fryc Printers, Boston, 



^Q6V 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY, 



A FARCE. 



FOR MALE CHARACTERS ONLY. 



CHARACTERS. 

Peleg Precise, Foreman. Job Timorous, Jacob Doubtful, 
, Abel Strongfist, Jarvis Jolly, Solomon Snowball, Den- 
nis O'RouRKE, Nathan Short, Enos Paunch, Brazen 
Blower, Peter Punster; Simeon Slow, Jurors. 



Scene. — A Jury Room. Table., c, with paper, pens, 
ink, &c. Twelve chairs around stage. 

Enter from r. all the characters, in the order in which 
their names are written, single file, across Stage, and 
face Audience. Door at r. is slammed and locked. 

Timorous. Good gracious ! we're locked in ! (Bushes 
across stage to r.) Here, officer ! officer ! 

Slow {at extreme r., catching Timorous hy arm, and 

171 



172 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

sw'mging him round). Stop that. It's all right, you 
know. 

Timorous. No, I don't. I'm afraid of fire — 

Punster {swinging him round to next man). What er 
that? 

Timorous. And subject to fits — 

Bloiuer {ditto). You're no /^ juror. 

Timorous. I must have air — 

Paunch {ditto). Where air you, now? 

Timorous. Or smother — 

Short {ditto). Take him to his mother. 

Timorous. What do you call this treatment? 

O'BourJce {ditto). The movement cure, bedad. 

Timorous. It's outrageous — 

Snowball {ditto). Da's a fac', da's a fac', honey. 

Timorous. Diabolical — 

Jolly {ditto). Ha, ha! now you go ag'in. 

Timorous. Infamous ! 

Strongfist {ditto). Move on, stupid. 

Timorous. I won't stand it. 

Doubtful {pushes him into chair). Then sit down. 

Precise {at table). Gentlemen, be seated. {All sit.) 
Before we discuss the case with which we have been in- 
trusted, perhaps we had better take a vote. 

Short. My idea exactly. 

O'Rourke. Begorra, let's take something cowld. 

Precise. We have been instructed to bring a verdict, 
" Guilty or not guilty." Please write your verdict. 
Here are slips of paper. {Passes them round. All write, 
some on the table, some on chairs ; Snowball writes his 
against the wall.) 



% 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 173 

O'Rourke {approaches Snowball). Whist! I say, 
d'ye write Guilty wid a G or a J ? 

Snowball. Ob course not. Write him wid a pencil 

— so. 

O'Rourhe. O, be jabbers ! It's yerself's a heathen 

— you ignoramus. 

Precise. Now, gentlemen, if you are ready. {Col- 
lects votes^ spreads them on table, and assorts.) 

Timorous. I want a glass of water — I'm faint. 

Strongfist. Shut up. Don't disturb the meeting. 

O'Rourke. Bedad, it's a glass eye ye'U be wantin' if 
yer do. 

Punster. PI is eye waters at the thought. 

Precise. Gentlemen, the vote stands, six *' Guilty," 
six *' Not guilty." 

Jolly. Hallo, a clean cut ! 

Short. Six mules in the crowd, certain. 

O'Eourke. A majority on both sides, d'ye mind. 

Snowball. Major who? Major who? Dar ain't no 
sogers here, hey, I ax you ? 

Precise. AVell, gentlemen, there's work before us ; and, 
that we may know each other, I propose that those who 
voted " guilty" take seats on the right, those who voted 
" not guilty," on the left. 

Short. Good. I'm for the right. 

Jolly. I feel decidedly (/M?'/^?/. 

Slozv. And so do 1. 

Strongfist. Rigiit face. March ! 

O'Rourke. Begorra, captain, I'll train in that com- 
pany. {They all pass to r. as they speak. Doubtful, 
Timorous, Snowball, Paunch, Punster, and Bloweb 
pass to L.) 



174 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

Punster. Though on the left, we're in the right. 

Paunch. Well, look here, I'm getting hungry. Ain't 
we going to have our dinner? 

Blower. You're always thinking of eating. 

Snowball. By golly, da's a fac'. Dat ar Mr. Punch 
hab an appetite like an earthquake. 

Paunch. Bah! what do you know about it? Well, 
wake me up when you're through. {Tips his chair hack 
against wall, throws his handkerchief over his face^ and 
falls asleep.) 

Snowhall. Dar, de old man gwine for Morphine. 

Precise. My vote was " Guilty," and of course I be- 
long with the party on the right. 

O'Rourke. Thrue for yez, honey ; and ye'll find it the 
party that's always right, jist. 

Snowhall. Hold yer hush, hold yer hush ! 

O'Bourke. Vat's that, ye heathen? I'd jist like to 
pound that thick pate till I had yer spachless — sol 
would. Begorra, ye'd cry Guilty then. 
Timorous. O, come, let's have peace. 

O'Bourke. Pace, is it? Ye've had a pace ^f my 
mind, oayhow. 

Precise. No quarrelling, gentlemen. The quicker we 
decide this case the better. The government has charged 
one Peter Popgun with an attempt to defraud the revenue 
of the manufacturer's tax on gunpowder. Its secret 
agents, suspecting said Popgun, made a descent upon 
his establishment, which is a country store, seized cer- 
tain articles, such as saltpetre, sulphur, and charcoal, 
which they found in a certain little back shop, said 
articles being, in their opinion, used by said Popgun 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 175 

in the manufacture of gunpowder. The said Popgun 
denies the manufacture of gunpowder, and sets up a. 
defence that the said articles are used by him in con- 
cocting a certain patent medicine, known as the " Med- 
ical Dead Shot." Evidence has been produced on both 
sides. We have been charged to bring in a verdict 
on the evidence alone. I am quite convinced, by the 
testimony, that said Popgun did manufacture gunpowder, 
and evade the tax. Still, I should like to hear a free 
expression of opinion. 

All (^jumping up). Mr. Foreman. 

Precise. Stop, stop. One at a time. 

All Yes, yes ; one at a time, Mr. Foreman. 

Precise. Stop, stop, I say. We can never settle it in 
this way. 

Strongest. Of course we can't. Let us six fight the 
other six. That will settle it. 

O'Rourke. True for yez. A fray fight. I'm wid yer. 
{^About to remove his coat.) 

Precise. Silence. There can be no fightins: here. 
You all want to speak. I will call upon each juror, 
giving both sides equal advantages of time and oppor- 
tunity. Is not that fair? 

All. Certainly. Of course. Go on. Go on. 

Precise. Very well. I will first call upon Mr. Tim- 
orous. 

Timorous (rising). Mr. Foreman, and gentlemen of 
the jury. {Very low.) I rise — I may say — yes, I 
rise — 

O'Rowrke. Louder. 

Strongfist. Speak up like a man. 



176 ..GENTLEMEN OF THE JtJRT. 

Timorous. I said t— I rise — to say, if I may say — 
I rise to say — 

O'Rourke. O, be jabbers, you're all out to say. 

(T/ie jiarty on the l., with the exception of Paunch, rise 
indignantly.) Mr. Foreman, Mr. Foreman ! 

Precise {pounds on table). Silence! Order, gentle- 
men, order. 

Blower. Mr. Foreman, this attempt of the party on 
the right to intimidate the party on the left is unjust. 

Funster. Far from being righteous or courteous. 

Snowball. Am we jurors, or am we not jurors? lax 
you ? 

Precise. The interruption shall not occur again. Go 
on, Mr. Timorous. 

Timorous. If you please, Mr. Foreman, I only rose 
to say — that, if I might be allowed to say it — that — 
I've got nothing to say. 
. Party on right. Sham6 ! Humbug ! Put him out ! 

Precise. Order, gentlemen. — Have you no reason to 
give for your vote of " Not guilty"? 

Timorous. O, yes; lots. I voted "Guilty," no, 
" Not guilty," because — well, because — Popgun don't 
look like a man who would concoct such a sanguinary 
mixture as powder. He hasn't the air of a ruffian. His 
thoughts don't run in that explosive channel. I'm some- 
thing of a physiognomist. 

Snowball. Mahogany! What's dat? 

Timorous. A physiognomist. I judge by the face — 

Party on right. O, humbug ! 

Blower. Mr. Foreman, I protest this attempt to stifle 
the voice of Justice is a high-handed crime. . 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. l77 

Snowhall. Yes, sar ; it's bigamy, kleptomania, arson. 

Precise. Order, gentlemen. — Go on, Mr. Timorous. 

Timorous. But then I haven't any particular opinion 
in the matter; and if you want me to change — 

Blower. Silieuce, traitor ! 

Snowball, Shut up yer tater trap. 

Punster. Suppose you sit, for a change. (Pulls him 
down to seat.) 

Timorous. Anything to oblige. 
- : Precise. Mr. Jolly. 

Jolly {rising). My turn, hey? Mr. Foreman, and 
gentlemen of the jury, — 

To make or not to make, that is the question. 
Whether 'tis better to let Popgun suffer 
The law's full penalty for mixing powder, 
Or to take arms against this awful tax, 
And by our verdict free him. 

Gentlemen, Popgun is a dangerous man. -I am for his 
annihilation. He is a second Guy Fawkes. Behind his 
shop are concealed those explosive materials destined to 
spread havoc and destruction in an innocent neighbor- 
hood. We might spare him if the possible destruction 
of a thousand or two of his immediate neighbors was the 
only consequence to be feared. But he's a sneak ; he 
dodges the tax. That we must not sutler. The medi- 
cine story won't do ; the dose is too lieavy ; it woti't 
stay on the stomach. That gun recoils upou Popgun, 
who is too heavily charged by the evidence to be dis- 
charged by this jury. (Sits.) 

Precise. Order, gentlemen. Mr. Doubtful. 
12 



178 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

Snowball. No, sar, no, sar. I move we lay him onto 
de table, sinner die. 

O'Eourke. Die, is it, ye black sinner? Howld yer 
pate, or you'll die jist. 

Doubtful {rising). Mr. Foreman, and gentlemen of 
the jury, there's one p'int in this evidence I want 
cleared up. 

O'Bourke. Is it a pint of whiskey, I donno ? 

All. Order, order. 

O'Rourke. That's what I'd like to do, and drink it, 
too. 

Doubtful. If that air Popgun made gunpowder, why 
didn't somebody see him do it? Cause a man's got salt- 
petre in his house, and sulphur and charcoal, it doesn't 
foller that he's goiug to make gunpowder. I've got 
charcoal in my house — kindle the fire with it; sulphur 
to bleach with ; saltpetre for curing purposes. But no- 
body ever said I made gunpowder. It's rediculous. 
Popgun's got eggs in his store. Why don't you say he 
hatched them? (Sits.) 

Snowball. Da's a fac', da's a fac'. Second de mo- 
tion. 

All. Order, order. 

Precise. Mr. Strongfist. 

Slrongfist. Well, you're a pretty set of sneaks over 
there, you are. 

All. Order, order. 

Strongfist. O, I know what I'm about. I'd like to 
get in among you. I believe in justice. I believe in 
any man's having his say in this world ; but I don't 
believe in arguing about a matter that's as plain as the 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 179 

nose ou your face. The man made gunpowder, and 
sold it, didn't pay the tax, and you fellows over there 
know it. You're- a set of obstinate fools; and it's the 
duty of all loyal citizens to stand by the government and 
punish traitors. The government's been insulted by this 
contemptible Popgun, and you fellows on tjie left uphold 
him. Our duty is clear, to bring you to your senses. 
(Takes off coat.) So, come on. (Squares off.) 

O'Rourke. I'm wid yez. Fag a ballah ! Erin come 
unim. 

All. Order, order. 

Precise. Gentlemen, peace, I pray. Mr. Strongfist, 
your argument is very weak. 

Strongjist. Is it? Well, my fist is strong; let me 
try that. 

Precise. No, sir ; you will please be seated. Mr. 
Paunch. 

Snowball (shaking him). Here, Mr. Punch, Mr. 
Punch. 

Paunch. Hey? O, yes. Mr. Foreman, I've got 
precious little to say. I'm hungry ; I've had nothing to 
eat since morning. I was invited out to dinner at five 
o'clock with Alderman Cross. Fine leg of venison and 
native tomatoes, sliced, stewed, and broiled. The alder- 
man is a capital eater, weighs three hundred and fifty, 
and has the best hogs — 

Precise. Won't you confine yourself to the question, 
Mr. Paunch ? 

Paunch. O, yes. Hogshead of Madeira you ever 
tasted. It's capital. Then his cheeses ! Good gra- 
cious ! they're mighty — 



180 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

Precise. Mr. Paunch, Mr. Paunch ! 

Paunch. They're mighty fine. What did you say, 
sir? 

Precipe. Will you give your reasons for voting " Not 
guilty"? 

Paunch. Certainly. Stop. Did I vote " Not guilty"? 
I don't remember. It don't make any difference. Settle 
it as you please, only remember I must dine with Alder- 
man Cross at five. i^Slts and goes to sleep again.) 

Snoivball. Question, question ! We'll all dine with 
Cross, hey ! I ax you. 

Precise. Mr. Slow, you next. 

Sloiu. Hey? Yes. Well, I don't know. Popgun 
did make gunpowder, I guess, cause he had a little shop. 
{Pauses.) 

-Precise. Well, go on, Mr. Slow. 

Sloiv, Yes. AYell, he had a little shop, Popgun had, 
and he made somethin' in that shop ; and if he didn't 
make gunpowder, he made somethin' in that little shop 
that he didn't pay no tax onto. And so he's guilty er 
somethin' or other in that little shop. So long's he's 
caught, what's the odds, as long as you're happy. (Sits.) 

Snoivball. Doubted, doubted. 

All. Order. 

Precise. Mr. Blower. 

Blower (rises., flourishes his handkerchief, blows his nose, 
strikes an at/itude). M-r-r-r-r. Foreman, and genteelmfen 
of the jury, it is with spotitaueoiis emotion that I rise to 
addi-ess you. You, genteelmen, with me, have looked 
upon a touching scene to-day. We have seen an enlight- 
ened citizen of this great republic, which, like the light 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 181 

of yonder firmament, attracts the attention of the whole 
world. We have seen him dragged from the bosom of 
his family and placed at the bar, at the bar, gentlemen, 
there to answer to grave and serious charges. It is evi- 
dent that in the mysterious depths of that little back shop 
something has been concocted. The government says 
'' Powder ; " the defendant says "- Shot." Powder and 
shot! "Powder" or "shot," in this case. One pos- 
sesses the power to blow the human frame into infinites- 
imal particles ; the other cures all ills that flesh is heir 
to. Can we pauses and deliberate ? Look at that man, 
dragged from the bosom of his family ; his wife and chil- 
dren — 

Jolly. Beg your pardon, Blower. Popgun is single. 

Blmuer. Hey? Dragged from the paternal mansion. 
Hear the cry of the agonized and aged mother of the 
prisoner, as she stands upon the doorstep and screams, 
" My child ! Bring back my little Popgun ! " 

Jolly. Wrong again, Blower. He's neither father 
nor mother. 

Blower. Hey ! Poor orphan ! without a friend in 
the world ! Can we turn our backs upon him? No. 
Let us be merciful. Let us indorse his patent medicine, 
and carry from this room a verdict of Not guilty. Then 
shall the tears of the orphan be squelched in gratitude, 
and the blessings of future generations of Popguns fol- 
low us. 

O'Bourke. Begorra, that's a techiog appeal. 

Precise. Now, Mr. O'Rourke, your turn. 

O'Bourhe {rising). I ax yer pardon, judge, Mr. Fore- 
man, and gintlemen all. Wid the blood of forty ginera- 



182 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

tions of O'Rourkes a seethin' with patriotic emotion in 
me bosom, d'ye mind ; with faylings of gratitude for the 
fray gifts of life, liberty, 'and the pursuit of happiness, 
guaranteed by this moighty republic, which, as I look 
back into the future, is iver prisint in all its glory, d'ye 
mind. Could I be so base as to da.sh myself foreninst 
those illigant laws that crush the wake and guard the 
strong? By the grane sod of ould Ireland, niver ! If 
that thaif of the wurld, Popgun, has transgressed the 
law, let him swing. And what for would he be mixing 
saltpatre and — and — and brimstone, and — and char- 
coal, if not to blow up somebody. Medicine, is it? It's 
my opinion that we'd better bring in a verdict of Guilty, 
and liang him, wid a recommendation to mercy, pro- 
vided forty doses of his Medical Dead Shot bring him 
to life afther he's been dead and buried siven days. 
Thim's my verdict, judge. (Sits.) 

Jolly. That's a reviving verdict. 

Precise. Mr. Punster. 

Punster (rising). Mr. Foreman, and gentlemen of 
the jury, the party popularly known in this suit as Pop- 
gun is a small aiFair, but I do not wonder that he kicks 
against this attempt of the government to charge him 
with powder he never made. How would you like it 
yourselves, gentlemen? Imagine yourselves Popguns, 
and happy in the disposing of butter, cheese, and — and 
hairpins to a needy community. Upon a luckless occa- 
sion, you sell ten cents' worth of powder to a red-headed 
urchin on the eve of our glorious iudependence. The 
awful crime is repeated ; and, by the power of govern- 
ment, you innocent Popguns are incarcerated on a grave 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 183 

charge. You hear nothing but powder ; you are loaded 
with reproaches and powder ; it is rammed down your 
thioats, until, like Popgun, you burst with indignation. 
Have we not heard from the lips of competent wit- 
nesses the amazing power of his Dead Shot? An old 
man had suffered forty years with influenza ; the Dead 
Shot stopped it forever. An old lady, bent double with 
the rheumatism, was made straight by its power. A 
young mother, whose tender infant had wailed night 
after night, was loud in its p'raises. Gentlemen, this 
suit comes from the malice and jealousy of an envious 
rival. Gentlemen, this is a conspiracy. Let us clear 
Popgun of the charges under which he labors, by ap- 
plying the match of justice to his overloaded soul. 
Then will he go off triumphantly, scattering destruction 
among his enemies, and give a good report of our de- 
liberations. (Sits.) 

Snowhall {jumping up). See here, white folks, what's 
de use? what's de use? 

Precise. Mr. Snowball, you're out of order. 

All. Go on, Snowball. Fire away. 

Snowball. Mr. Foreman and gemblem. Of course 
it am. Why not? And, if not, wherefore? I ax you. 
If de blessed Constitution of dese ere United States ob 
America don't permit the humblest of her sex to choose 
de proper medicines for dar physical systems, wedder it 
be gunpowder of gunpowder tea, what's de use ob bein' 
citizens and ciiizenesses of dese here republic? I ax you. 
Who's Popgun? Am he, or am he not, a phusician? 
I ax you. I don't care what his moral perquisites be, 
wedder he vote de demicratic or de bobolitiou. Does 



184 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

he cure de squills which air am flesh to? I ax you. 
When dat ar old man, which my white brudder alluded 
to, had de influendways, did he stop his sneezin? I ax 
you. When dat ai* old woman hobble to him wid de 
rheumatics, did he straighten her out? I ax you. When 
dat ar baby squaked in its slumbers of midnight, did 
Popgun's Dead Shot fix it? 1 ax you. If so, and you 
find it so, — and I ax you to find it so, — you are forced 
to acquit Popgun as a medical dedical sturgen and phu- 
sician — ob course you am ; for don' de stolid phalanx 
of justice circumbend every man on Columbia's footstool, 
wedder black or white, male or female? and de aurora 
borealistic splendors of eternal vigilance abide in de 
scrutinized recesses of de enlightened jury-room? I ax 
you. 

O'Bourhe. Begorra ! send for an interpreter. 

Precise. Mr. Short. 
'''■ Short {comes down to table). It's my opinion, gentle- 
men, there's been a great deal of time and gas wasted in 
our deliberations. I've got very few words to say on 
this subject. Popgun manufactured an article which the 
governmeut said was gunpowder. Popgun deaies it. 
That is the question for us to decide. We were shown 
in the court-room a sample of this disputed article. It 
looked like gunpowder ; it smelt like gunpowder ; it felt 
like gunpowder. I took away, the box. Here it is. 
{Produces box.) Some of you tJiink it is not gunpowder. 
I propose to give it a practical test. {Places box on table, 
takes off cover, takes a match out of his focket.) 

Timorous. What ! You're not going to fire it off! 

Short. Don't be alarmed. There's only a pound or 
two. It can't do much damage. 



GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. l85 

Stroiujfist. You'll blow us all up ! 

Jolly. The man's crazj. 

O'Rourlce. Begorra, there ! Aisy wid yer pranks. 

All. Stop him ! Stop him ! 

Short. Here she goes. {Draios match across table.) 

All. Help! Murder! Officer! Put him out, &c. 
(Timorous crawls under table ; Snowball jumps up into 
chair and makes frantic attempts to crawl tip the wall ; 
Doubtful rims into corner, pulls Paunch up to cover 
him ; Blower gets down and covers himself with a chair ; 
Precise stops his ears, and crouches in a corner ; Strong- 
Fist and Punster seize Short, one on each side; 
O'Rourke seizes Short by coat-tail behijid ; Jolly and 
Slow try to get behind each other.) 

Precise. Would you murder us? 

Strongfist, Blow us to pieces? 

O'^Rourhe. Call in the judge. 

Short. Let me go, I tell you. {Kicks 0*RouRKE, 
strikes Precise and Strongfist, and sends them to the 
floor.) 

O'Rourke. Fm kilt intirely. 

All. Help! Murder! Help! 

Short {holding the match). Now, gentlemen of the 
jury, here is a conviucing test. Shall I apply it, or are 
yo4i ready M'ith a verdict? 

All. No. Yes. Verdict. Verdict. 

Short. Gentlemen, what is your verdict, guilty or not 
guilty ? 

All. Guilty. 

Short. All right. Mr. Foreman, make out your 
papers. {Blows out match. All resume seats.) 



186 GENTLEMEN OF THE JURY. 

Timorous. Well, I never bad such a scare in all my 
life. 

O'BourJcG. By me soul ! I say a wake a comia' for 
the last of the O'Rourkcs. 

Snowball. By golly, I'm all ob a hot chill in my back- 
bone. 

Precise {who has heen writing) . Gentlemen, listen to 
your verdict. " We find the defendant, Peleg Popgun, 
guilty." 

Jolly. " So say we, all of us." 

All. Ay. Ay. 

Short. Then there's no further use for this box of saw- 
dust, I suppose. 

All. Sawdust? 

Short. Exactly. You thought 'twas gunpowder. 
No matter. I saw I could throw dust iu your eyes with 
it. I can't say much for your argument. You're like 
all the rest of this universal Yankee nation — anxious to 
fasten your tongue tackle on to every question. There's 
a very plain case here, which might have been a very 
knotty one but for the sawdust, which has brought you 
to terms, and thus proved a better medicine than Pop- 
gun's celebrated Dead Shot. 

CURTAIN. 



Plays for Amateur Theatricals. 



BY GEORGE M. BAKER. 

Author of '^Amateur Dramas," " The Mimic Stage" " The Social 
Stage," &'c. 



DRAMAS. In Three Acts. 

My Brother's Keeper. 5 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 

In Two Acts. 

Among the Breakers. 6 male, 4 female characters. 15c. 
Sylvia's Soldier. 3 male, 2 female characters. 15c. 
Once on a Time. 4 male, 2 female characters. 15c. 
Down by the Sea. 6 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 
Bread on the Waters. 5 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 
*The Last Loaf. 5 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 

In One Act. 

Stand by the Flag. 5 male characters. 15c. 
*The Tempter. 3 male, i female character. 15c. 

COMEDIES AND FARCES. 

The Boston Dip. 4 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 
The Duchess OF Dublin. 6 male, 4 female characters. 15c. 

* We're all Teetotallers. 4 male, 2 female characters. 

15c. 

* A Drop too Much. 4 male, 2 female characters. 15c. 
Thirty Minutes for Refreshments. 4 male, 3 female 

characters. 15c. 
*A Little More Cider. 5 male, 3 female characters. 15c. 

Male Characters Only. 

Gentlemen of the Jury. 12 characters. 15c. 
A Tender Attachment. 7 characters. 15c. 
The Thief of Time. 6 characters. 15c. 
The Hypochondriac. 5 characters. 15c. 
A Public Benefactor. 6 characters. 15c. 

•Temperance pieces. 



PLAYS FOR AMATEUR THEATRICALS. 

COMEDIES AND FAUCES ^continued). 

. The Runaways. 4 characters. 1.5c. 

Coals of Fire. 6 characters. 15c. 

Wanted, a Male Cook. 4 characters. 15c. 

A Sea of Troubles. 8 characters. 15c. 

Freedom of the Press. 8 characters. 15c. 

A Close Shave. 6 characters. 15c. 

The Great Elixir. 9 characters. 15c. 
♦The Man with the Demijohn. 4 characters. 15c. 

Humors of the Strike. 8 characters. 15c. 

New Brooms Sweep Clean. 6 characters. 15c. 

My Uncle the Captain. 6 characters. 15c. 

Female Characters Only. 

The Red Chignon. 6 characters. 15c. 

Using. THE Weed. 7 characters. 15c. 

A Love of a Bonnet. 5 characters. 15c. 

A Precious Pickle. 6 characters. 15c. 

The Greatest Plague in Life. 8 characters. 15c. 

No Cure No Pay.. 7 characters. 15c. 

The Grecian Bend. 7 characters. 15c. 

ALLEGORIES, Arranged for Music and Tableaux. 

The Revolt of the Bees. 9 female characters. 15c. 
Lightheart's Pilgrimage. 8 female characters. 15c. 
The War of the Roses. 8 female characters. 15c. 
The Sculptor's Triumph, i male. 4 female charac- 
ters. 15c. 

MUSICAL and Drainatic Entertaintnents. 

The Seven Ages. A Tableau Entertainment. Numer- 
ous male and female characters. 15c. 

Too Late for the Train. 2 male characters. 15c. 

Snow-bound ; or, Alonzo the Brave and the Fair 
Imogene. 3 male, i female character. 25c. 

Bonbons ; or, The Paint- King. 3 male, i female char- 
acter. 25c. 

The Pedler of Very Nice. 7 male characters. 15c. 

An Original Idea, i male, i female character. 15c. 

Capuletta; or, Romeo and Juliet Restored. 3 male, 
I female character. 15c. 

* Temperance piece. 



C^ 36. 

c) 
I) 
O 
t) 

o 



<l) 



40. 



CO 

o 

i) 42. 



8 



SPENCER'S TJITIVEIISAL STAGE. 



37. 



38. 



44. 



45. 



47. 



48. 



C) 60. 

o 






I>iainond cut T>iamoiid. An In- 
terlude in One Act. Hy W. H. Mur- 
ray. 10 3Iale, 1 Female character. 

Xjook after Bro^vii. A Farce in 
One Act. By Georg-e A. Stuart, 
M. D. (i Male, 1 Female cliaracter. 

Monseigneitr. A Drama in Three 
Acts. I5y Tliomas Archer. 15 Male, 
3 Female characters. 

A very pleasant Evening. A 
Farce in One Act. By W. E. Suter. 

3 Male characters. 

Brother Ben. A Farce in One 
Act. By .J. M. Morton. 3 Male, 3 
Female characters. 

Only a Clod. A Comic Drama in 
One Act, I?y J. P. Simpson. 4 Male, 

1 Female character. 
Gaspardo tlie Gondolier. A 

Drama in Three Acts. By George 
Almar. 10 Male, 2 Female charac- 
ters. 

Sunshine through the Clouds. 
A Drama in One Act. By Slinj^sby 
Lawrence. 3 Male, 3 Female char- 
acters. 

I>on't Judge hy Appearances. 
A Farce in One Act. By J. M. Mor- 
ton, 3 Male, 2 Female characters. 

HTursey ChickAveed. A Farce in 
One Act, liy T, J. Williams. 4 
Male, 2 Female characters, 

Mary Moo ; or, Which shall I 
Marry? A Farce in One Act. By 
W. E, Suter. 2 Male, 1 Female 
character. 

X^ast ]L<ynne. A Drama in Five 
Acts. 8 Male, 7 Female characters. 

The Hidden Hand. A Drama in 
Five Acts. By liobert Jones. Id 
3Iale, 7 Female characters. 

Silverstoue's ^Vager. A ("ommedi- 
etta in One Act. liy R. K. Andrews. 

4 Male, 3 Female characters. 
Dora. A Pastoral Drama in Three 

Acts. By Charles Keade. 5 Male, 

2 Female character-!. 

Blanks and Prizes. A Farce in 
One Act. liy Dexter Smith. 5 
Male, 2 Female characters. 

Old Gooseberry. A Farce in One 
Act. By T. J. Williams. 4 Male, 
2 Female characters. 



6.3. Who's "«\'ho. A Farce in One Act. 
By T. J. Williams. 3 Male, 2 Fe- 
male characters. 

54. Bouquet. A Farce in One Act. 2 

Male, 3 Female characters. 

55. The Wife's Secret, A Play in 

>ive Acts. By George W. Lovell. 
10 Male, 2 Female characters. 

50. The Babes in the Wood. A 

Comedy in Three Acts. By Tom 
Taylor. 10 Male, 3 Female charac- 
ters. 

67. Putkins : Heir to Castles in the 
Air. A Comic Drama in One Act, 
By W, K, Emerson. 2 Male, 2 Fe- 
male charac.ers. 

58. An Fgly Customer. A Farce in 

One Act. Jiy Thomas J. Williams. 
3 Male, 2 Female characters. 

59. Blue and Cherry. A Comedy in 

One Act. 3 Male, 2 Female charac- 
ters, 

CO, A Doubtful Victory. A Comedy 
in One Act. 3 Male, 2 Female char- 
acters. 

61. The Scarlet XiCtter. A Drama in 
Three Acts. 8 Male, 7 Female char- 
acters. 

02. W^hich will have Him P A Vau- 
deville. 1 Male, 2 Female charac- 
ters. 

63. Madam is Abed. A Vaudeville in 

One Act. 2 Male, 2 Female charac- 
ters. 

64. The Anonymous Kiss. A Vaude- 

ville. 2 Male, 2 Female characters, 

65. The Cleft Stick, A Comedy in 

Three Acts. 5 Male, 3 Female char- 
acters, 

66. A Soldier, a Sailor, a Tinker, 

and a Tailor, A Farce in One 
Act. 4 Male, 2 Female characters, 

67. Give a Bog a Bad IVame. A 

Farce, 2 Male, 2 Female Characters, 

68. I>amon and Pythias. A Farce. 
I <i Male, 4 Female characters. 

69. A Husband to Order. A Serio- 
1 Comic Drama in Two Acts. 5 Male, 

3 Female characters. 
' 70. Payable on Demand. A Domes- 
I tic Drama in Two Acts. 7 Male, 1 

Female character. 



ri 



Q 



Price, IS cents each. Descriptive Catalogue mailed free on application to 
CEO. M. BAKER & CO., 

149 WA8HISOTON St., Bostov. 



LIBRARY OF CONGRES! 




Flays for Amateur Tlieauiw«i,ii». 

By GEORGE M. BAKER. 




}C.-\ 



Author of "^ Amateur Dramas," " The ilimic Sroffc." " The Social Stage," " The Drawing-room Stage," 
"A liuker s Dozen," ifC. 

Titles in this Type are IVeiv Plays. 



DRAMAS. 

In Three Ads. 



Cts. 



My Brotlier's Keeper. 5 male, 3 
female characters 15 

In T1V0 A cts. 
Amonf^ the Brealcers. 6 male, 4 

female characters 15 

Sylvia's Soldier. 3 male, 2 female char- 
acters 15 

Once on a Time. 4 male, 2 female char- 
acters 15 

Down by the Sea. 6 male, 3 female 
characters 15 

Brkad on the Waters. 5 male, 3 fe- 
male characters 15 

The Last Loaf. 5 male, 3 female char- 
acters 15 

In Ofie A ct. 
Stand BY the Flag. 5 male characters. 15 
The Tempter. 3 male, i female charac. 15 

COMEDIES and FARCES. 

Tile Boston l>lp. 4 male, 3 female 

characters 

riie l>ucltess of I>ublin. 6 male, 
4 female characters 

We'ke all Teetotalers. 4 male, 2 
female characters 

A Drop too Much. 4 male, 2 female 
characters 

Thirty Minutes for Refreshments. 
4 male, 3 female characters 

A Little More Cider. 5 male, 3 fe- 
male characters 

Male Characters Only. 
Ciientlenien of tlie Jury. 12 char. 
A Tender Attachment. 7 char. . . 
The Tliief of Time. 6 char. . . . 
Tlie Hypochondriac. 5 char. . . 
A Public Benefactor. 6 char. . . 

The Kunaways. 4 char 

Coals of Fire. 6 char 

Wantkd, a Male Cook. 4 char. . . . 
A Sea of Troubles. 8 char 



FARCES. 

Freedom of the Press. 8 char. ... 15 

A Close Shave. 6 char 15 

The Great Elixir. 9 char 15 

The Man with the Demijohn. 4char. 15 
Humors of the Strike. 8 char. ... 15 
New Brooms Sweep Clean. 6 char. . . 15 
My Uncle the Captain. 6 char. ... 15 
Female Characters Only. 

The Red Chignon. 6 char 15 

Using the 'Weed. 7 char. ..... 15 

A Love of a Bonnet. 5 char. , . . 15 

A Precious Pickle. 6 char 15 

The Greatest Plague in Life. 8 -ha. 15 

No Cure, no Pay. 7 char 15 

The Grecian Bend. 7 char 15 

ALLEGORIES. 

Arranged /or Music and Tableartx. 

The Kevolt of the Bees. 9 female 
characters 15 

Lightheart's Pilgrimage. 8 female 
characters 15 

The War of the Roses. 8 female char- 
acters IS 

The Sculptor's Triumph, i male, 4 fe- 
male characters 15 

MUSICAL AND DRAMATIC. 

The Seven Ages. A Tableau En- 
tertainment. Numerous male and fe- 
male charac'ters 15 

Too Late for tjje Train. 2 male char- 
acters 15 

Snow bound ; or. Alon?o the Brave 
and Ti e Fair Imogene. 3 male* 1 
female character 25 

Bonbons; or. The Paint-King. 3 male, 
1 female character 25 

The Pedler of Very Nice. 7 male 
char.icters '5 

An Original Idea, i male, 1 female 
character *S 

Capuletta : or, Romeo and Juliet 
Restored. 3 male, 1 female character. 15 



TEMFERAKCE riECJES. 

The Last Loaf. 5 male, 3 female characters 

The Tempter. 3 male, i female character 

We're all Teetotalers. 4 male, 2 female characters. 
A Drop too Mich. 4 male, 2 female characters. . . • 
A Little More Cider. 5 male, 3 female characters. . 
The Man with the Demijohn. 4 characters 



IM 



